Distant Grumblings Part 4: Who's James?

*Taken from my journal on 06-26-09

Tonight was somehow special apart from the reason that I was able to finally watch Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, I had a date. A rather special guy I met in g4m. His handle was shy-chef, well he was rather not shy actually. He gave me a message that he liked my eyes, and from there I replied back and the rest was history. This is different from the rest of the guys that I met in the past because it was a date. A real, no-sex date. It was kind of awkward though, because I was clueless that he wanted to caress him in his privates until he said it when we were about to part ways.
I like him really. I can see myself taking the "serious" route with him. But I don't want to rush. Plus, I don't want to be the first to suggest a relationship. The way he was disappointed when I never did what he wanted kinda sent a message that he is not yet into the "serious" path. or maybe I'm just speculating too much like before. I don't know if he likes me too or not. I just hope that he does because I really like him (obviously).

---

About Rommel (thinkbig), well he is really history. He gave me clap. but I was able to ask for help. Thanks to my best friend. Now I'm clear of it.
Ryan is history as well. he kind of thought that I was too clingy when in fact I was just too excited about the sex. It didn't happen though, too bad it didn't, but it's his loss.
Chrisson doesn't text anymore but who cares, top40buff also doesn't text, but it's okay.

---

Now that I like James, I am beginning to hate myself because I am too obvious. Argh! I don't know what else to do. This emotion clouds my judgement.