Used to being Single???

>> Sunday, October 5, 2008


I think I am now used to being single. I have been single almost all my life and now and I don't know if I feel good about it or not. Sometimes, when melancholy strikes in, I sulk on the thought of me finding a partner, but when it seemed that I found him, I suddenly realize I don't feel love at all. Now this has occurred twice now and every time I think about it I become hesitant to try again. Can you believe? I don't really know myself. Unbelievable. But it's true. I think of reasons to justify my actions, and I came up with just maybes and not sure answers. Maybe I haven't found him yet, maybe I am really snobbish just like what my friends say, maybe I just can't stand the thought of someone following my every move, maybe I am just enjoying my time being single (huh? I don't seem like I'm enjoying it) okay, I'm wrong about that, anyway, perhaps I am just too timid to act, I mean, I certainly would not find him if I don't do something about it, like stay in one place. I have to move and find him. I think that two persons who are meant to be together always gravitate towards each other, and when I stay static, nothing happens. Maybe. Nothing really is a sure answer, but for now I guess I have to find it. Take it into an experiment, find what's true and what's not. Now that's something I am sure about.

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